One night in the club, my friend *Christina and I totally let loose while dancing with this guy in dreads. He was wearing a red sweater. We were at Red Light, a (famous?) well-known club near Montparnasse in Paris. We killed it. We killed the music, the energy, the vibe. We had no idea who he was, but he probably came up to one of us to dance. I can’t remember who he asked first, but one of us responded, and she danced. Then he turned around and came over to me – or her – okay now! So our fun dancing battle began. We jived, we bumped, we grooved to the old '90s hip hop music. I thought my dance with him was on point. Then he turned back to Christina, and the competition was on. She killed it with him. And then he turned back to me, and we killed it, and so on. The music was loud, the place was crowded, the spirit was high, but the only thing that mattered was our dancing.
We didn’t care what we looked like. I didn’t care how I was moving. I just moved, and I know I looked good, because I was happy. I felt free.
Two nights ago, I danced with Les Twins in Boston. They’re here for the Beyoncé & Jay-Z concert tonight, so they gave a workshop to all the dance aficionados out there, myself included. I was mesmerized by their talent but too shy to move (the way that I wanted to) because I felt I wasn’t as good as they are. I didn’t want to look like a fool. My mind was controlling me, so I failed to find that feeling of freedom.
But when you have it, it’s bliss. It’s judgment-free. You tell yourself you look good, and you do. Or you just ignore yourself and listen to the music and it tells you you look good. I hope one day I can go back to the feeling I had that night in Paris. When I gave 1000% back to the energy I was feeling and was given. When there was no self-judgment to hold me back, but only excitement to keep propelling me forward. Freedom is Fearlessness.
The workshop on Sunday was still magical, despite my shyness. I probably had all the fun in my life in those few hours that we shared with them, despite how fast the time flew. I’m so happy to have been there that the energy I have inside now just can’t be contained. And I know that there are parts in my life that are waiting for me to exercise my fearlessness, and to come into my own - especially with my writing. I need free. I need fearless.
*Name changed to preserve her awesomeness.